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The Rules of Gentlemanly Conduct:

by Geoff Gander

1. The Gentleman shall not avail himself of crude or otherwise objectionable Language, nor shall he resort to lewd Gestures.

2. The Gentleman shall always give proper Respect due a Lady, and shall, in every possible Way, accommodate her Needs.

3. The Gentleman shall be Charitable to those less Fortunate than himself.

4. A Gentleman shall always be Prepared to fight for the Honour of a Lady.

5. A Gentleman is above all a Loyal Citizen of the Realm; he does not incite Treason, nor does he issue Statements detrimental to the Sanctity of the Realm, or of its lawful Sovereign.

6. All proper Gentlemen of the Red Sash shall abide by these Strictures, or be cast out.